Can Teachers Have Crushes On Students
We all know most districts and educational institutions have policies against teachers dating students. And while most teachers try to adhere to this policy, teachers sometimes end up crushing on students.
Like everyone else, teachers are made of flesh and blood, and can sometimes develop an attraction to a student, especially in cases where there’s hardly any significant age difference between them.
This happens a lot at tertiary levels where teaching assistants and some lecturers are sometimes even younger than their students. Teachers who adhere to their professional standards ensure they do not put themselves in positions where they might develop any form of attraction for any student and have strategies to easily curb any such thoughts.
Unfortunately, the internet is full of cases where some teachers broke the teacher-student boundary by acting on their urges even in cases where students were significantly younger.
This has led to society’s mentality and suspicion of male teachers especially at the early and basic education levels resulting in more female teachers at these levels of education. To answer the question of teachers crushing on students, we’ll say:
Yes. While most teachers wouldn’t admit it or act on any such impulses, teachers sometimes crush on their students mostly in cases where they’re close in age or in tertiary institutions. That said, teachers who act on these impulses risk their teaching licenses and up to 20 years imprisonment.
Teachers are tasked with the responsibility to care for their students serving as role models and even parents to their students. Any sexual relationship with a student leaves the teacher legally liable irrespective of the student’s age.
That said, crushing on someone isn’t a crime even for teachers, but acting on those urges is a breach of district and school policies with serious repercussions. Save yourself and your career by refusing to entertain any such thoughts about any student.
Penalties For Inappropriate Teacher-Student Relationships
While crushing on someone may seem innocent, it’s morally considered wrong in the case of teachers crushing on students. Teachers who entertain these emotions and end up acting on them, stand to face consequences that could simply ruin their lives.
Imprisonment
Improper relations between teachers and students are punishable by up to 20 years in prison and additional fines.
Sex Offender Registration
A convicted teacher would also need to be registered as a sex offender.
Criminal Record
This lands the teacher a permanent criminal record
Teaching License
The teacher would also lose their teaching license barring them from teaching again. Finding any decent job outside the teaching profession becomes difficult to impossible.
Public Opinion
The court of public opinion would condemn you even after you’ve served your time.
Do Female Teachers Get Attracted To Students
Yes, while rare, some female teachers sometimes become attracted to their male students. While the teacher cannot be penalized for any attraction to a student, giving in to any urges or impulses can have serious consequences including loss of license and incarceration.
Most male teachers are of the opinion that there’s a double standard in the case of female teachers having relationships with male students.
When a beautiful female instructor has sex with a young, male student, the relationship is unfortunately fetishized. Male students are seen as heroes and given the opportunity to live out their hot-for-teacher fantasies.
In the case of male teachers and female students, the teachers are instantly vilified as perverts taking advantage of the authority given to them in school. Touching a student inappropriately even by mistake is seen as a sexual offense in the case of male teachers.
Do Male Teachers Get Attracted To Female Students
Yes, male teachers can sometimes become attracted to female students, especially in cases where there is very little age difference between them. Acting on any inappropriate feeling will however lead to dire consequences including loss of teaching license and incarceration.
Male teachers are easily perceived as predators and any accusations brought against them could ruin their careers and their lives in general. Unlike in the case of female teachers where a male student may be hailed as a hero in some cases, male teachers are simply condemned in cases of inappropriate sexual relationships with female students.
Can A Teacher Date A Student If They Are 18
No, most districts and educational institutions have policies against dating students irrespective of their age. Teachers who breach these policies risk losing their licenses and possible incarceration.
While 18-year-old students are considered adults, educational institutions have strict policies governing teacher-student romantic relationships irrespective of the student’s age.
Teachers are trusted by their institutions and parents of their students to educate these students, protect and mentor them in a safe learning environment. Any sexual misconduct accusation against a teacher by a student negatively impacts the reputation of the institution.
Is It Common For Teachers To Have Crushes On Students
No, while it does happen, it’s not common for teachers to have crushes on students. Most teachers are trained professionals able to control any urges or situations that could give rise to romantic feelings for their students.
Additionally, the fear of dire repercussions of any accusations of sexual misconduct against students keeps teachers away from the thought of romance between themselves and any student.
Male teachers especially are careful to avoid any accusations. This has resulted in the teaching profession being dominated by females, especially at the lower education levels.
How Can Teachers Deal With Crushes On Student
Don’t Entertain The Idea
No matter how beautiful or handsome your student may be, simply remember that you’re considered a parent to these students. Never entertain the possibility of anything outside a mentor-mentee kind of relationship irrespective of how attractive you may find the student.
Reduce One-On-One Interactions
If you happen to spend a significant amount of time with the student, it’s time to reduce that level of interaction. Limit any interaction with the student to the classroom where other students are present. This reduces the likelihood of flirting with the student.
Unless absolutely necessary, refrain from talking to them. Modern students like to use social media and would like to send their teachers friend requests. Don’t accept their friend requests on social media.
Talk To Your School Counsellor
Don’t worry, they’ve most definitely heard what you’re going through before. A school counselor or a private counselor if you’re in deep would be helpful in this case. Let them help you get rid of any attraction you may have towards your student.
Remember The Consequences
Relationships with students will have dire consequences for any teacher. Ask yourself the question “Is this worth destroying my life over?” Teachers can lose their licenses, their reputation, and up to 20 years of their lives if caught in a romantic relationship with a student. Save yourself and your career.
Self-Reflection
Think about how or what led to this crush on a student and try to find solutions to avoid a repeat situation as you’ll continue to meet even more students so long as you continue in the same career.
Talk To A Respected Peer
Sometimes you just need to talk to another experienced teacher. You never know. They may have been in a similar situation. Make sure you do not mention any student names in your conversation.
Pick Up A Hobby / Start Seeing Someone Else
You can start seeing someone else or in cases where you’re not ready to date, you can simply pick up a hobby. Sometimes you may just be lonely. Get into a relationship with someone your age and you’ll be surprised how quickly you’ll forget about the student. Meet new people. Try dating apps if possible.
You people and society as well as the authorities have got to be kidding. You’re ignorant, prejudiced, judgemental, make terrible administrators, and don’t even have any form of proper logic and reasoning whatsoever. You’re not even being objective. Educators are human too. They will err now and then. Yet you impose an excessively high double standard upon them, even though their love is mutual. You should know better. The most you should do as punishment is to impose a separation of the two parties until the student graduates. Worse still, you even try to severely punish educators who are younger/more inexperienced than their students. Where had your logic gone, oh self-satisfying self-righteous ones? As long as they are no longer student and educator, everything is fine. Also, if they are being perfectly fair and just and not playing favorites or anything like that, and the student is mentally and emotionally mature enough, it’s perfectly fine even as a student-educator relationship. After all, educators who play favorites or have pet students are far worse. Not to mention that this world is full of adult babies who aren’t mentally and emotionally mature. Why else do you think there are so many cases of divorce and abuse,etc.? Chronological age is completely unrelated to one’s wisdom and intellect and maturity. What in the world do you fools think you are doing, wasting the talents of many possibly good educators out there just because they happened to make a small a very human mistake? Why not punish the student as well as the institution of education (even more seriously for not properly handling things) while you’re at at, being as foolish and short-sighted as you are? Human resources, especially good ones are very limited, you know? Especially educators. Because so few are good enough to be educators and even fewer are willing to be educators. It’s not an easy job after all. It’s a noble job that very few take and are qualified to take. And you would waste those few resources for your pointless and worthless, not to mention meaningless self-righteous, self-satisfying morals?! Even a dog has more sense. I come from a lineage of scholars since the ancient times of one of the most ancient civilizations, and we have been producing academics, professionals, educators, researchers, etc. every generation, not to mention train many others. I am not saying that students and educators should have relations that are best left for after the student graduates, but nevertheless, even if they do, as long as they are both mentally and emotionally mature enough and it is a mutual relationship, it is none of our business as long as treatment and the like in classes and tests, etc. remains fair for all. For that is the mark of a true educator. One that should be respected by all and emulated by all. As for other aspects of the relationship, it is not wrong at all. Are you trying to say that touching a fellow human on the shoulder or whatever is wrong? That’s the most warped way of thinking that I have ever come across. Not only have I taught others since I was a kid in kindergarten, as well as tutored students younger than myself, but who were close to my age, so I know how it feels to fall for your own student, since it sometimes happens, though you need to exercise self-restraint as much as possible (as I said, educating others is one of my lineage’s strengths), but I have also worked in a law firm before. I read the law as one of my hobbies. That and Medicine (including Psychology). Love is part of nature, and so is being aroused, etc. Because humans are animals as well. As long as they wait for the appropriate time (graduation), touching, etc. is fine. Or would you rather become one of those extremists who scream rape or molestation for simple patting them on the shoulder or back, etc.? That would be most foolish. These are my two cents as someone whom many people come to for advice, and someone who was considered by many to be wiser than most adults and to have greater foresight than others by age 11 or younger.